Growing; Get up and do it already

So this post is going to be a bit of a mixed bag on too many things. It may not even feel connected to itself. It has been an exceedingly rough week, and I am quite done with it. I had a different post planned, one that was going to be thoughtful and maybe even stoic, good and properly Pagan in all of the right places, but today and this week just aren’t the times for them. It has been bad enough that I am having some trouble putting thoughts together, but I know I need to, for my own piece of mind.

I won’t get into the specifics of what happened this week, well not all of them, but I will say what I said on FB, (I don’t always like admitting that I use it.) If this week had been food, I would return it, without wanting a replacement or my money back, I just want it gone. Over. Done. There were a series of really quite unfortunate events, which, while completely unrelated to one another, ultimately culminated in the death of my paternal grandmother on Thursday. She had not even been very sick for long, she was only really ill the last few weeks, she was in and out of the hospital, and then all at once, she passed. Her husband passed on good Friday of the previous year, so I suppose that it makes sense that she would pass so very close to her beloved husband of 60 years in a similar fashion, on a similarly holy day of their faith. It is hard to see my father, a generally somewhat closed emotionally man, break down and cry so often. Losing your mother has got to be hard.

Being who I am though, and what I am, I know that dying is a part of being alive, and it is such a necessary part of being alive too. Because what is life, if we did not die? What would it mean? What COULD it mean? Being philosophical, or understanding about it, doesn’t make it happier, nicer, or frankly, easier to deal with. But it does give me a different way to deal with it. The thing I am keenest on doing right now is taking a bit of soil from both gravesites, (I first need to check on the legality, or local rules of such a thing, can’t be caught doing something can get me arrested…) and putting it into a pot and starting a small tree. The only current problem with this is the lack of a place to put the poor little tree once I have started it. Unless I plan on keeping it as a bonsai, which I have had less than poor luck with in the past.

This is not meant to be the entirety of my post. I have no intention of lingering on the past, or on the negative, every life should be a celebration, (again, death being a part of said life.) and I mean to have a few drinks in the honor of my ancestors, especially the newest within the ranks of ancestors in spirit. Another thing I have been meaning to do is find a proper spiritual community in the area I am currently living. I have had an affinity for the Unitarian Universalist church recently and have been meaning to attend a service or two and see what it is all about. The doctrines sit well with me, and the specific mission statement of the local congregation (dunno if I am using the correct word,) are of particular interest to me.

As members of a welcoming, religiously liberal community, we care deeply about each other, our children, our neighbors and our Earth.

Together, we provide a haven for nourishing the spirit and mind, while we strive to build a just and sustainable world.

We covenant to respect our differences, and to commit our time, our treasures and ourselves to this mission.

I just cannot argue with a belief system like this. Any organization that is built upon these beliefs seems well suited to me and what I do. I suppose my biggest hurdle is that I have not been “church going” in a number of years. I seem to not want to break out of the “spend the day in pajamas” cycle. I basically need to get my butt out of my lovely-loungy bed, and get to this lovely place and be a part of a community in a more personal sense, and in a larger sense. It is time to care for the world around me in a way that makes a visible difference. Not for myself, as I don’t much care what the world at large thinks of me, but I do care about what the world at large thinks of pagans, and I really do want to make a positive impact in that way.
So here is to taking what the powers that be throws at you and growing from it. Here’s also to getting the heck up and just doing it!

Late-Winter, or Early Spring?

So since spring has started we have had more snow around here than we had all winter. Go figure!

Since it is snowing after the official first day of spring, is it a late- winter snow, or an early spring one? Well, it was certainly pretty. The hubby did not like it much, but he has shoddy brakes, and balding tires, and I suppose it is a fair enough sentiment, except that there was no snow on the roads. It was nt even cold enough for the snow to stick to more than the freezing little plantlings starting to come up. It has been getting toasty since then, which is probably for the best, I do like it toasty.

I hope spring is finding everyone fairly well, I do love me some spring, well I love em all, better when its warm though!

Follow-Through

I know, again, this topic feels all not-pagan-y, but it is, at least to me it is. Maybe it is more witchy than pagany, but, eh semantics.

This really does have a bit to do with spell-work. We do all the planning for our spells and we find all of the right things, and we do everything in the right order. Then we raise our energy and cast our spell. And it is all done, we quit worrying about it, but why don’t we care anymore?

This is not true for everyone some people ARE really good about their follow-through. Asking for raises after money spells, putting job applications in after job spells, going out and talking to people after love spells. More people seem not to. It seems as though some people want to go through the motions and say the words and let someone, or something else do everything else for them.

Spells are great, I can do things with magic that I never could without it. But the universe, or divine, or spirits aren’t all perfect, they will not bend they laws of reality for you, they make things move in your favor, but if you can’t be bothered to start the ball rolling, there is no point in there being a place to get it. If you don’t back your magic with a few actions often the spell itself is even incomplete, and nothing can happen, because you may be actively holding it back. Magic can help you achieve your goal of being a bit skinnier this year, but not if all the food you are living off of comes from the donut shop… There is only so much your spell can do, if you don’t really care whether or not it works…

Maybe that is the crux of the issue, why most spells require follow-through, because without the follow-through, you aren’t really putting your energy behind the spell. You are holding it in, and really fully committed to making the spell work, or having what the spell may result in. If the results of the spell are not going to be something you are prepared for, then maybe it is a good way of judging whether or not the spell should work. Just my thought on this though, and I am certainly not perfect.

Happy Equinox!

Another sun rises, without fanfare

On another new day

Another morning dawns anew

And another moon lies down

Another night fades away

As they always do

Another day begins as the world continues to spin

And the year moves on once more

Just as it always has

Failure and equality

I don't care if it "qualifies" as a pagan issue, it is a human rights and safety issue which should concern everyone, pagans and buddhists, catholics and protestants, athiests and fundementalists.

Watch this video, and read this article.

"The epidemic of rape in the military may have finally reached a turning point with the case of Lt. Colonel James Wilkerson. After being convicted by a military jury last November of aggravated sexual assault, and sentenced to a year in jail, Wilkerson was set free by Lt. General Craig Franklin, who dismissed the case using power granted to commanders in the Uniform Code of Military Justice."

“I was assaulted. I reported it. I endured the public humiliation and the end result is that it was all for nothing,” said Wilkerson’s accuser in a statement.

“The Secretary of Defense has absolutely no voice on his country’s policy on Israel…Even on military deployment issues and military budgets, the Secretary of Defense is merely one of the many voices the president will hear when the president makes decisions about our tactical military choices in Afghanistan and elsewhere…But the Defense Secretary does have sole jurisdiction over how to handle what is now an absolutely out-of-control crime wave in the United States military for thousands of American soldiers; the military has become a rape club.”


This is a failure. I don't care who you are, but with all of the supposed "progress" the military makes in the direction of equality and rights, a convicted rapist can walk away without punishment and be put back into a position of power. People have been raving about it within churches for a few years, but why are we silent on the issue in the US military? It is not OK to be silent, at all, this needs to come out, and needs to be said. Rape is never OK. There is no such thing as "legitimate rape" Rape is rape, whether you fight, or you are drugged, or are coerced, rape is ALWAYS RAPE!

This is the situation for every woman in the military. Not every woman has a chain of command support system to help them. If the person who is the problem has powerful enough friends, you are nothing more than a target, or a conquest. If you do not have proof that it was rape, then in many cases as far as your unit can be concerned, you were never raped. This is not right, and this should be taken care of.

Life is amazing, and inherently magical. No part of it is evil or wrong or dirty. Nothing that any human is born able to do is unnatural. People are nature and it is all a part of the divine.

Maybe that’s the problem, people forget what makes a person a person, and we allow one another to lose their divinity. We stop seeing people as other people, and start seeing them as problems, or annoyances, or in our way. Maybe that is why some people see themselves as better or more important, or endowed with some aspect of divinity that others lack, which simply is not the case.

I am no better than you, and you are no better than me. We are all equally human. Whether we are talking about someone’s right to their body and its autonomy, or about being unable to afford sufficient healthcare to lead decent lives. We are all the same. The same as no one has a right to decide what’s good for me, I have no right to tell you how to raise your children, (and believe me there are people some days…) No one has the right to rape or kill another person, ever. I don’t care if you think women should be subservient to men, or you feel like the woman wants it and is teasing you, it doesn’t matter (and this does not just apply to women, men are raped as well, and in larger unreported numbers, than many people have been lead to believe.)

You can think you are better than me, and you can do what you like with that thought, but if you decide to act on this, and you decide to do something that harms another person without their consent You deserve what the law and a jury of your peers says you deserve, and sometimes, much more. What two consenting adults do to one another with one another’s permission is not my concern, it is what happens when there is no consent that concerns me.

When the way people live and the culture we are a part of makes it ok for a person to lose part of what it means to be a person, in order for someone else to feel more important, or to glorify someone else’s belief in an angry vengeful deity, then it is a time for a change. A big overarching change.  A change like we have not seen in many years. We need to change our culture and our society, we need to erase this perception of gender roles, and inferiority for groups of people. We need to look at all people as though they are equal. Whether you feel like people were created, or designed, or a random chance. Being alive is amazing, and natural, and even sacred. We need to treat our own and everyone else’s bodies as such, and stop trying to take autonomous control of bodies which are not the ones we were born in.


One man can overturn the decision of a jury and make all of the humiliation of rape and reporting and testifying be for nothing. Think on that for a moment. Then we can talk about equal rights...


Article and quotes courtesy MSNBC Video from youtube

Vernal Equinox

Considered one of the lesser sabbats by many witches, but not me, I love the lesser sabbats. I have more affinity to the astrological dates, the days when clearly the universe is sending a message, where the balance of the earth is changing. These are the dates I have been close to since I was a wee one.

Mine are really not this pretty

This one is so pleasant too, spring is coming. I know the equinox is not until the 20^th of march, but today is the E and I’m gonna take it! This day marks the truest dawning of the spring, the seeds are sown inside and some early spring flowers are starting to come up, many others are blooming. The rabbits, are waking up and getting frisky, hence the symbol of fertility. The day is always full of rabbits and colored eggs and spring and flowers. I plant my wee seeds, and hope the sprouts don’t get eaten by cats. I paint egg shells as gifts, and make egg shaped candles for the altar and daytime ritual. (Some of these crafts may be posted as we near the date!)

This sabbat is just a part of the turning of the earth, another symbol that it all comes back around. No matter how bad it seems or long the darkness may feel, it cannot last forever, nothing can. The world must remain in balance.

Dear Goddess, Help me!

Goddess of transformation, painting
Jen Lester

Dear Goddess,
Help me to know what is worth fighting for and which battles are already lost.
Help me to see the beauty in everything and dismiss nothing as ordinary.
Help me to wake up every morning and feel renewed rather than worn out.
Help me to see the divine in myself rather than looking so far away.

Dear Goddess,
I know you watch and I know you wait.
I know you want me to learn and I know you rejoice as I do.
Please allow me the space to make mistakes without hating myself for them.
Please help me to see that I am only human and cannot always be perfect.

Dear Goddess,
Help me to know when to use my sword and when to use my shield.
Help me to understand the nature of the things I can understand.
Help me to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Help me to love, through fear and pain, and always shine in your light.

In Sickness and In Health, Edification.

No, last week I did not make a PBP post. I felt bad about it, I enjoy making them, and I feel like they do help me put thoughts in order, but I was ill, and therefore had other priorities.

That said this week I am making a post, and I may even start scheduling others, (non PBP related.) In an attempt to help me better understand myself and my practice, and to force a little personal edification, I shall be posting more. Look for thoughts on Mondays and Tuesdays in addition to my usual Friday postings.

Today also marks My first anniversary with my wonderful husband, (sort of, we were married on the 29^th of February.) I am happy to be married to such a wonderful and supportive person.

Ahem, right, now on to my PBP post!

Edification

Woo hoo! That sounds a bit pretentious doesn’t it? Well it’s something I have been feeling, (no, I know edification is not a feeling, just bear with me.)

You know that place in your practice where you get used to it? You know your god/ddess/ deity/ whatnot. You know what you do that works, and you enjoy what you are doing, then about 3 years or so down the road you start to feel a little bit burnt-out, like these things you are doing are not doing for you what they once did? Many people suffer a crisis of (is faith the right word here?) at this point. Why do we let ourselves get to that point? Why do we let ourselves get used to things? Are we just trying to stay within our comfort zones, or do we fix ourselves on the patterns of every-day life, and making our practices every-day at the same time.

We forget to keep learning and growing, we no longer stand in awe of the universe, thinking we already understand it. We allow ourselves to become weighed down by groups or life and do not take the time for our personal and spiritual learning. So many people are depressed or anxious about the world and life that it gets in the way. But learning and growing is always good for us, and learning almost anything can be a spiritual endeavor. Why shouldn’t it be? Make it part of a daily devotion (or weekly, depending on how much time you really do have.) to learn something new, about the world, about history, about your deity, about everything!

Make life your edification!

Breathe new life into what you do whenever you can!